a glimpse of my Love

I married my best friend. Plain and simple. Did I know I was marrying my best friend? No. Were we best friends when we got married? Definitely NO. Is he everything I imagined my husband would be? Absolutely not... He's sooo much better!

My husband is the one person on this earth who knows me inside and out. Sometimes I hate it... but most of the time, I love it... and all of the time I'm in awe because of it. I've had a rough week with various personal crap that's all up in my head. I've been struggling with it off and on and most of the time, I just push it way back into the cracks of my brain and try to forget about it. It usually works, until I have to dig it back out and actually deal with it. Ugh. That's so hard.

I realized how much of a hold my husband has on my heart late last week when all of this ugliness started. At first, I was really really mad. Like, mama bear going after some camouflaged colored lunch. {No worries, no people were hurt, and this has nothing to do with my cubs.} But I was really really angry. So, I called the one person who I want to talk to when something terrible happens... my husband. And what began as an angry voice explaining what had happened, quickly turned into a wavering, trembling voice that just went right into sobbing. I'm talkin' the ugly cry... tears burning the eyes, snot running freely down my face, facial distortion and everything. It was really ugly. But, after I talked with him, I felt better {a little bit anyway}. He knew what to say to calm my tears and mend my heart {or at least put a band-aid on it}.

Tonight we revisited that situation because it needs to be fixed. So as we were discussing what I should say, if I'm right in feeling the way I do, and what he thought I should do. My husband had some words to share with me. I would love to say that they were dripping with sweetness and were the most romantic words to ever come out of a man's mouth... but I can't. He pretty much told me that "he doesn't like when people treat me badly, take advantage of me and are unappreciative of all that I do. ...That's his job."

Sadly, those words were what I needed.

My husband has a distinct way of saying things to push my buttons. It's his gift, I think. And he is really good at it. And he even has sound effects to go with the button pushing. {He makes me laugh.} But really? No matter what he says, I know he adores me. How do I know this? Because he's stuck by me through 15 years of crap, and we've made it out alive. He's my heart. He's my gift. He's my love.

I'm so thankful for him and I think he is the most amazing man in so many ways.